Baby first sicknessĀ 

This past Friday night consisted of a 4 hour visit to the ER… After a pretty busy week, Olivia had been abnormally sleepy on Friday. She slept most of the day which was kind of odd for her. As the day turned into night she started to feel warm. After taking her temp, I leaned that 99.4 is not a fever and a fever isn’t considered a fever until 100.4 and above. After texting the doctor (how amazing is that?) I felt reassured that she was okay. Lo and behold- two hours later Olivia felt fiery hot and her temp read 101. Fuck. This time I called the doctor and after some questions she urged us to go to the ER since it was 10pm and she was under 3 months. Cue emotional distress and mommy tears. Fortunately we are right across the street from the hospital. Since babies are incapable of telling you what bothers them, I watched my daughter get poked and prodded as I helpless cradled her head and sobbed. They took blood, they took urine and upon our departure my daughter got an antibiotic shot in the leg in the event a bacterial infection was brewing. Over the next three days we battled with a flucting fever ranging from 100.7-103.6. Fortunately besides sleepiness, she was relatively herself. She wasn’t lethargic or engaging in any odd behaviors. She was eating regularly, actually more so and filling up diapers like a Champ. Regardless of being reassured by the doctor on our visits on Saturday and Sunday for follow up antibiotics, I was a mess. My mind kept deviating to the worst case: loosing the little love of my life. This weekend was my living hell. FINALLY Tuesday morning at 5:30am, her fever broke. Although she seemed to be on the uphill, my emotional distress had manifested itself into hives overtaking my entire body and a loss of 4 pounds. I don’t know how parents of terminally ill kids do it. I cannot fathom and although my heartbroke for them prior to this weekend, I feel like I can empathize on a much smaller scale. It’s fucking scary. 

Fortunately all of her blood work and collections came back negative and it appears to be a virus. Nothing life threatening, just a immunity builder I suppose… 

Of course as a parent, I am battling guil; what did I do to expose her to a virus that knocked her of for almost 4 days? Maybe I am too lax with her since she goes everywhere. Maybe I should be one of those parents that keeps their kid inside more? Maybe I should be more careful on who holds her? Maybe I should wrapped her in a bubble… 

Despite the distraugthful weekend, my little girl is definitely feeling better and I am feeling more and more grateful for this little nugget. 

Baby brain is when…

You misplace you newly bought lube (because apparently sex is excruciating after birth regardless of delivery type) and  finding in your daughters toy basket… After 20 minutes of your husband and you searching your relatively tiny house from top to bottom…